*sigh*

Hello hello helloooo...

I had a feeling that once this costume was finished, I was going to feel a gaping hole in its place, and I do, even though I mustn't. There are so many directions to go from here, it was just nice being so obsessed with something. It kept me so occupied, busy, and learning -- plus it boosted my self esteem. Making costumes is a lot of fun.

But those directions I'm talking about: the ones that I should go, I'm dragging my feet about. The ones I shouldn't, I'm more inclined.

Hatter's very first cosplay video was shot last week on this day, and edited a couple nights ago. Most of the footage was bloopers because I was flying by the seat of my pants, but it's so surprising and fun how fleshed out this became in post-production! lol



It'd be so fun to do more stuff like this, show him off, come up with more shenanigans, episode reenactment, build props for him (like his boysenberry phone). My friends seem to like it, too.

John also saw a photo I posted. He wrote "wowza!! and brava!!" and then was gone. Back right into the blue from which he came! Silly man. He's so busy, I know that if he really didn't like it, he would have just scrolled on and pretended not to have seen, so he must have liked it! I tagged him for the video, and I just pray he laughs. Laughter is one of the few things I can give back to him, after all his character (and he too on occasion) has given to me.

~ ~ ~

Anyway, the work week was plagued with migraines, so I took this weekend just to recuperate and didn't do much else. I took a nice, long bath with a cinnamon apple bubble bar. Last night, I had a restless little nap and woke up feeling exanimate. Didn't know who to talk to who would make me feel less alone, or stimulated. I hate when that happens.

Seems every time the holidays roll around, I want to whip out and replay Paper Mario, and sometimes also PM2: The Thousand Year Door. It's such feel-good nostalgia. And now I have memories of replaying it during the holidays which are also pleasant.

In general, I've felt this need while resting around this weekend to pick up things that I enjoyed once upon a time, to see if that same feeling would come back. Like, I remember when I was home on Winter Break in 2012 -- which jfc feels like it could be yesterday -- I would read another couple chapters of In the Shadow of the Dream Child, a Charles Dodgson biography. It was a fascinating read. Then later, I would go download more episodes of Whose Line Is It Anyway? using the clubhouse internet, then watch them with Jenna. Man, we loved that show. lol It was the perfect way to wind down. Then before I knew it Greg Proops was a character in our AU?!

A part of me thought of picking up that book just to return to that headspace... or rather, see if that headspace was still nestled between pages that have not been turned since that time.

Don't really understand why I want that time back so much. It was stressful in its own right, and there were many things I did without that I have now. I also don't know why I get all these migraines, but doc has finally been more useful and referred me to a neurologist, so we'll see.