He was a maniac without a nose,
She was a vapid bimbo from Sweden

Phantom humor, sometimes I just can't get enough of it. XD

Anyway, I'm without computer right now. The one that I'm using to type this is being loaned to me by my computer guy until they can find out what's wrong with Hermy. Unfortunately, while it's sleek, clean, and has internet, it randomly shuts off. He warned me that there may be something wrong with it, but we both agreed that it didn't really matter given that I'd only be using it for three days.

I was going to begin writing He's There with it at the park, taking advantage of my last week here in my home, where the park is close and I still feel comfortable, but because of this shutting-off problem, it's impossible. The fact that I'm here writing this entry is a gamble in itself.

But! The reason I decided to stop by is that I'm trying to work on my to-do list as well as I can, so I started revising CP3 (without Kate's help) and got through three parts. Already, it's become funnier and more coherant, and I'm looking forward to Kate seeing what I did and maybe adding to it if she feels like it. This is probably what I'll be up to until I get my computer back, so I'm going to see how far I can get.

Overall, I feel really lazy about 2011, not getting to He's There until the last quarter, but I promised myself I'd be dedicated to it this Autumn. I always always always try to think of things optimistically too, lest I end up wallowing in disappointment with myself or having unfair standards. Life has gotten in the way. We're selling our house of all my life. I just haven't felt like writing for some reason.

But hey! CP3 will have a website and CP4 will have started. Two of my goals will be done, and there's still opportunity to do others. It's all up to me to find time in between my four classes. I only need to be fueled by motivation. I'll be motivated as long as I keep my mind on it. They say an active body stays active. The same goes for minds, right? Nothing made me more excited to do He's There work than just reading the book, or watching a movie. And then Halloween is right around the corner, and I need to get to work on my Lon Chaney costume!

I've gotta work in AIW again too. I feel just horrible that it was a whole year ago that I wrote a short story that I loved and then just stopped with that. What about Hare and Rabbit switching bodies?! What about Hatter buying that jacuzzi?!

Even when I don't write because I honestly don't feel like it, I'm still lonely without it. I still always wish that I did feel like it. I think that's how I know I'm a writer and not just somebody "trying to do it" as I might say when I feel I wasn't prolific enough. A writer is someone whose being is defined and shaped by the fact that writing is in their lives. A normal person, I think, wouldn't feel this way, the way I do, if they just gave up stories. They wouldn't mope around, feeling empty. lol Nor would they feel so godamn triumphant, and dance around the house, just because they got back into it. I still remember doing can-cans when Chapter 24 of He's There was finished in August 2009, a little before I had a writing streak during NaNoWriMo. Those moments are awesome, but only writers have them.

So, at the end of the day, I have to feel good knowing those moments are in the future for me, even after a year like this. Which isn't over, by the way! Think of it that way. I'm never really out of control. You get back what you put in.

Well, here's a bar I can hope to fill in the next few days! (Edited!)

5 / 15 words. 33% done!

♥,
Jennifer

Circumstances have really turned me away from being creative in any way lately, but I found myself re-reading my revised chapter one of Tilly & Jo, again, and I've known every single time that it will be a hooker.

I forbid myself to start it until He's There is finished and edited, but even if I could now, what has always stood in the way has been that Gina doesn't have a personality and there isn't a strong plot.

A couple days ago, though, some ideas were brewing about how to fix those problems.

Gina's problem in the chapters I've written is that she's so terribly passive. She says things please or surprise her, which isn't always bad, but she doesn't take any initiative as a main character. It's a big mistake to expect your secondary characters to steer the ship. So I've decided that before any of this starts, I owe it to myself, AND to Tilly and Jo, to have a person narrating this book with a personality as strong as theirs.

How would one do that, though? And also, how could it be complimentary of theirs, making the interactions really pack a punch, and the story a true transformation archetype?

The answer to me came in the word "complimentary", and also in my comparison to them as an alice, a hatter, and a hare. (COMPLETELY unrelated to Adventures in Wonderland type ideas. I think this came beforehand.)

I wrote in the revised beginning (which may be taken out for later because of a conflicting idea) that Gina related herself to an Alice that was very good at following her advice, and I thought I would run with that idea that she is much like the opposite of Tilly & Jo.

* While they are free and disorganized and very flexible, Gina requires a little too much structure and has trouble adjusting to changes. I didn't want this to be something to do with stress from her family - I wanted it to be something even her family observed, as some entertainment purposes even, as self-strictness.

* While they treat every place like home and are not the neatest folks (although Tilly's a little better than Jo), Gina is too conscious about her behavior outside home, inhibited, perhaps a bit formal, and going along with having trouble with change, she relies on order, physically and socially.

* While they wear like the same clothes every day and eat off each other's plates, Gina, I think, would make a funny germaphobe. The kind that has sanitary wipes in her bag and showers/changes a little too often.

* While they have very little besides their clothes and what Jo can fit in his pockets, Gina's sorta loaded. Not loaded like her parents are filthy rich, but her Californian family is doing fine financially to put it simply, and she can be hesitant to let go of things, even if she doesn't need them anymore.

* While Tilly & Jo both have individual passions and talents (Tilly: art, dancing, history) (Jo: marine biology, music, sports), they have to put some of them on the back-burner so they can keep their heads above water, and neither know when they will be ready to properly return to society to pursue these things. Neither care about achieving outstanding heights, gaining recognition, or making money. Gina on the other hand has a very self-propelled drive. She takes her strengths seriously and aims to do something with them. She plans to retain a high GPA in high school (nevermind that freshman and sophomore year hardly count at all in the long run) and get into a good school, with either an academic or sports-related scholarship. Originally she played soccer, but I may be changing that. I don't know what her planned major is or most interested subjects, but I was thinking that she may have interests surprisingly similar to Jo's and it can aid in their friendship, since she has a harder time relating to him.

~ ~ ~

Yeah, I know she sounds like a different person, but it needed to happen because she really wasn't cutting it before. She provided no amount of excitement or personal force. This won't stop her from being friendly or taking risks, but it's contrast - it makes it a challenge on both sides.

Equally, it makes the transformation everybody's. She can be taught and they can be taught to adjust things about their lifestyles. Everyone can find a situation where they are weakest, most intimidated, and their eyes are most opened.

I guess in the alice - hatter - hare sense, Alice is taught that it's okay to visit Wonderland regularly, and the Hatter and Hare are taught that there is more to life than just sitting at the table drinking tea and being silly (ignoring the part about how Time hates them)...

And while I've created another female protagonist that I can relate to, I don't see her as me, even though she has small parts of me. I wanted to make sure she didn't turn out like Lily, and in this prospect she isn't. Lily might say her organization and non-slacking is a mite annoying. In some respects, Lily is actually closer to Tilly at heart because neither want to let go of that freedom to be their crazy self, with their partner in crime (although luckily for Tilly, Jo is 100% trustworthy? lol)

~ ~ ~

I'm still a REALLY long way from having this figured out, but step one is developing the three characters to the brim. Past favorite colors and foods and activities. I want to know where they've been in life, what scares them and hurts them the most, how their experiences have reflected their habits and attitudes. In a way, I never even got that far with He's There's characters, perhaps because I thought I knew them all so well just by personality. Tilly & Jo, being a transformation story though, relies heavily on having such handles on characters, though.

I still intend for it to be 150-200pgs in length. There will be less intensely personal comments and details, there may be times when days are just briefed over - unlike He's There, it's not a chronology where the nitty-gritty details make it what it is.

Of course, I say this now but it's hard to predict. I love exploring small things, so sometimes I have more length than necessary. At the least, He's There takes place in the span of... 8 months. Tilly & Jo is only 3. So I guess even if I wrote it with as much detail as HT, it could turn up half as long, which IS like 200pgs.

Well, I've talked a lot now. I'm just keeping this on record for when T&J is in "pre-production". I look forward to that day.

Until then, I'd better finish what I've already got. :D

P.S. I wonder if some of my inspiration for Gina's lifestyle comes/will come from glancesherlock? Tcheheh.