So, the news that I failed to share in a timely manner on here.
I'm not in the mood to carve out a chunk of my night to ruminate about this, so I'll just put it simply, on this day, June 11th, my former bestie's birthday:
Jenna apparently didn't like me very much or value our friendship nearly the same as I did, and she ghosted me very much on purpose. Or, she grew to dislike me, and didn't even have the heart to appreciate our earlier times? I don't know, I didn't ask or want more details, but this is what Sam, her very own ex, said. And in the same email that he admitted this, he told me that she had suddenly broken up with him when things were very serious, and he was preparing to move to be with her. She also ghosted a friend of theirs, and was terrorizing another in their Discord server before just... leaving him and everything behind. Her "Alice empire", which seemed to be the only thing she's ever cared about ever since I met her.
Such a long string of WTF behavior from her, that couldn't have started with me and didn't end with me either, and probably still goes on in her personal life.
And yet, today, June 11th, her birthday, I think of her. I think of her on all of her birthdays. I told Sam it was one of the best friendships I'd ever had, even if somehow that isn't what it was for her.
Needless to say, it feels like I've been gaslighted. By her, by reality. And it's shaken some foundations I had, some shreds of conviction I was able to retain even after loads of bad treatment from people close to me... that at least I could somewhat trust my senses. I had no gut feeling whatsoever that Jenna was shit-talking me behind my back, which apparently she did, to Sam. Bless his heart, he has proven that he knows very little about us, because she never talked about it.
Today, June 11th, I think of her and wonder about her, and have told so many people about her and our times. My mom, and a couple of my closer friends, know plenty about Jenna, because her name passes my lips, her memory is in my heart. Pretty crazy to think that this was never reciprocated.
Of course, Sam feels that this is a reflection of her, and not us. And no sign that she was just so damn lovable, and we were not. But it feels that way, y'know?
Anyway, dropping by to say this and moving on. But even knowing this now, I can bet that a year from now, on June 11th, I will think of her then, too.
I'm not in the mood to carve out a chunk of my night to ruminate about this, so I'll just put it simply, on this day, June 11th, my former bestie's birthday:
Jenna apparently didn't like me very much or value our friendship nearly the same as I did, and she ghosted me very much on purpose. Or, she grew to dislike me, and didn't even have the heart to appreciate our earlier times? I don't know, I didn't ask or want more details, but this is what Sam, her very own ex, said. And in the same email that he admitted this, he told me that she had suddenly broken up with him when things were very serious, and he was preparing to move to be with her. She also ghosted a friend of theirs, and was terrorizing another in their Discord server before just... leaving him and everything behind. Her "Alice empire", which seemed to be the only thing she's ever cared about ever since I met her.
Such a long string of WTF behavior from her, that couldn't have started with me and didn't end with me either, and probably still goes on in her personal life.
And yet, today, June 11th, her birthday, I think of her. I think of her on all of her birthdays. I told Sam it was one of the best friendships I'd ever had, even if somehow that isn't what it was for her.
Needless to say, it feels like I've been gaslighted. By her, by reality. And it's shaken some foundations I had, some shreds of conviction I was able to retain even after loads of bad treatment from people close to me... that at least I could somewhat trust my senses. I had no gut feeling whatsoever that Jenna was shit-talking me behind my back, which apparently she did, to Sam. Bless his heart, he has proven that he knows very little about us, because she never talked about it.
Today, June 11th, I think of her and wonder about her, and have told so many people about her and our times. My mom, and a couple of my closer friends, know plenty about Jenna, because her name passes my lips, her memory is in my heart. Pretty crazy to think that this was never reciprocated.
Of course, Sam feels that this is a reflection of her, and not us. And no sign that she was just so damn lovable, and we were not. But it feels that way, y'know?
Anyway, dropping by to say this and moving on. But even knowing this now, I can bet that a year from now, on June 11th, I will think of her then, too.
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